0243 131 669


Web Hosting for the masses

The "Barely Adequate" Plan

  • Our Barely Adequate plan is perfect for those who enjoy living on the edge. With just enough disk space and bandwidth to keep your website running, and zero email accounts, you'll be living life dangerously. Our website builder is non-existent, but who needs that anyway? Plus, our customer support is limited to a single email address, so you can enjoy the thrill of waiting for a response.
  • Disk Space: Just Enough
  • Bandwidth: Good Luck
  • Email Accounts: What's an email?
  • Customer Support: Email address which may or may not be checked
  • Seriously though
  • Disk Space: 5GB
  • Bandwidth: Unlimited
  • Websites: 1
  • Email Accounts: 5
  • CPU: 2 Cores
  • Ram: 2 GB
  • Customer Support: Ticket


The "Marginally Better" Plan

  • Our Marginally Better plan is for those who demand a little bit more. With almost enough disk space and bandwidth, and one whole email account, you'll be living the high life. Our website builder is basic but functional, and our customer support includes a phone number that may or may not connect you to someone who can help.
  • Disk Space: Almost Enough
  • Bandwidth: Could Be Better
  • Email Accounts: One
  • Customer Support: Phone number that may or may not connect you to someone who can help
  • Seriously though
  • Disk Space: 5GB
  • Bandwidth: Unlimited
  • Websites: 2
  • Email Accounts: 25
  • CPU: 4 Cores
  • Ram: 4 GB
  • Customer Support: Ticket


The "Kind of Impressive" Plan

  • Our Kind of Impressive plan is, well, kind of impressive. With more than enough disk space and impressive bandwidth, and multiple email accounts (we won't tell you how many, but it's definitely more than one), you'll feel like a king or queen. Our website builder is top-notch, but we won't brag about it (okay, maybe just a little). And if you ever need help, our customer support is available 24/7 via carrier pigeon.
  • Disk Space: More Than Enough
  • Bandwidth: Impressive
  • Email Accounts: Multiple, but who's counting?
  • Customer Support: Available 24/7 via carrier pigeon
  • Seriously though
  • Disk Space: 30GB
  • Bandwidth: Unlimited
  • Websites: 5
  • Email Accounts: 50
  • CPU: 8 Cores
  • Ram: 8 GB
  • Customer Support: Ticket + Phone


Our Portfolio

We are Loved ♥️ by our Trusted Clients

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Firat Hicks
Founder of xyz.com
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Sarah Morrison
Founder of xyz.com
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Leland Bloggs
Founder of xyz.com
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Jessica Morrison
Founder of xyz.com

Why Choose Us?

We’re the only ones who know how to make technology that is both completely baffling and totally unnecessary.
We offer the most affordable IT solutions on the market – as long as you don’t count the cost of hiring a team of experts to figure out how to use them.
If you’re looking for a company that values style over substance, look no further than us. Our products may not work very well, but at least they look good doing it.